Thursday, February 28

I pierced my nose last night, I think my mom will rip it out.

Posted at 12:29 PM | 0 comments

Tuesday, February 26

I don't think I am going to have time to post a blog later, so I'll do it now.
My dripping hair is cold on my back, but it's okay.
It feels peaceful, I dunno why.
But anyways I found out Phil lives right next to me again.
I was kinda scared though cause he was like hitting on me a little.
Oh yeah, and I defiantly need to find out if I'm fucking pregnant.
I want to party, and I don't want to hurt or kill my poor fetus.
So yeah, I might go to the clinic tonight then.

Posted at 3:38 AM | 0 comments

Sunday, February 24

I wish I was beautiful.
I wish I was skinny.
I wish my boobs were bigger.
I wish I never have to shave.
I wish my skin was a little paler.
I wish I didn't have so many damn moles.
I wish I wasn't so gross.
I wish my eyes where blue.
I wish my face wasn't so fat.
I wish I had money.
I wish I was an individual.
I wish I could be myself.
I'll go alone, kthxbye.

Posted at 11:28 AM | 1 comments

Does anyone even read this anymore?
Anyways, I've been having crazy dreams lately.
Like last night some kid was choking and not breathing so I went to my guidance counselor and was like he needs help.
She was like one minute.
I was like no bitch now he's dying!!
Yeah okay.
I'm hungry, bye.

Posted at 8:24 AM | 3 comments

Saturday, February 23

I didn't want to say anything just yet, out of fear of my mom finding out, but I might be pregnant.
[Don't flip out, and spam me with comments.]
I made a stupid decision and decided to go to my Guidance counselor for info...
Well she said she was going to call my mom.
I was like aklhfoisduf90sd no.
I was like I am not even sure at all yet, you don't need to be getting her all hyped up.
Well she said she like had to, and I was like whatever.
We went and talked to the nurse, and she was really kind about it.
So we talked, and they said they wouldn't call yet.
Well I went to lunch and talked to Christian.
He told me I shouldn't have talked to her, and I felt all horrible cause I didn't know like if she was going to call or not.
Well we decided to go to his house and relax, so we left.
Later on I got home and checked the caller ID there was a call from my mom, brian, and ryan.
They called before I even got out of school.
So I started tweakin, and Christian calmed me down.
A bit later I checked my home phone messages.
My mom got a message from the vice principal, and once again, I lost it.
I called my love, and was like I bet the fucking counceler made him call my mom over me skippin school, then like had him refer my mom to her.
Well guess what?
I was 100% right.
Well my mom came home and was like so you're pregnant?
I was like I dunno.
She just said that's nice, and started talking to my bro.
She didn't yell, or be mean, or even make fun of me.
I was so surprised.
So pretty much shit's straight.
The only person being an ass about it is Brian.
He's all making fun of me and shit, and it's really annoying.

But anyways, I'm not all sure I am yet.
As soon as I know something, you will.
I'm taking my first test as soon as Christian buys it.
If negative, I will take another one at the beginning of March, unless I start my period of course.
Well that's it, in a nutshell anyways.


Posted at 5:55 AM | 0 comments

Friday, February 22

10 People
Read First
If you ask if you are on this list, I wont tell you.
If you think you are and ask me I wont tell you.
Even if you guess right.

10- I envy you, I want to be just like you. I think I actually might want to be you, but regardless I still effin love you.

9- You're special to me. If it wasn't for you I would seriously be dead. We've had tough times, but so many awesome ones to go with it. Can't wait to see you again.

8- I despise you. Everytime I think about you all I want to do is vomit everywhere. I can feel my hatred for you burning in my gut, and I belive you can feel it to.

7- You're my baby, and I love you. I want to grow old with you, and be with you forever. You mean so much to me that I think I could die. Thank you.

6- You're so smart, I want to be just like you. I wish I could touch the skin of your face, just so I can be completely sure you're real.

5- I miss you sometimes. Sometimes I sit here and think about everything you've done for me. If it wasn't for you I wouldn't know how to love. I know at the time it seemed like you were the worst thing on the planet, but thank you. I only miss you occasionally. Get on yahoo xP.

4- You're so crazy, lol. You are like one of my best buddies in the world. Get out of lockup fool.

3- [Group] You guys are my friends. It fees nice that you accept me this easily. You guys rokk!

2- When I think about you, I smile. You once were the world to me. You always know how to make me smile, and you're just great.

1- I only wish I could hate you. I want to leave you forever, and never look back. My gut keeps me here, and after all these years all I can say is well.. Why me? Sometimes I wish you got that abortion.

Posted at 1:22 PM | 0 comments

Thursday, February 21

Bang x2
Well um, I'm very emotional these last couple of days.
I saw this dude on myspace, and he made me puke.
All because he reminded me of Jack Dougherty.
Yeah, for real shit.
So well I don't know.
I hate school, I don't want to go.
At least I get to see Christian =]
Even though we leaving cause I wanna watch O Brother Where Art Thou.
Hahaha loves it.

Posted at 3:38 AM | 0 comments

Monday, February 18

Well I don't really know.
The good and bad, just shit is so.. I don't know.
I don't know if my life is good or bad.
I don't know if i'm happy or what.
Is so confusing!
I'm hungry.

Posted at 2:24 PM | 0 comments

Well I don't really know.
The good and bad, just shit is so.. I don't know.
I don't know if my life is good or bad.
I don't know if i'm happy or what.
Is so confusing!
I'm hungry.

Posted at 2:24 PM | 0 comments

Sunday, February 17

The sun will set for you.

So um wow.
My verdict will be reached Monday, March 3rd,
at precisely 1:06 p.m.
My whole life will come down to that very second.
Why does this have to happen?
Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.


Posted at 8:46 AM | 0 comments

Thursday, February 14

The candyman can.
It's valentines dayyy!!

I love him<3

Posted at 7:34 AM | 0 comments

Tuesday, February 12

I want him beside me forever.

Posted at 6:23 AM | 0 comments

Friday, February 8

I can feal it moving through my veins.
And I like it.

Posted at 8:53 PM | 0 comments

Thursday, February 7

Things are so great I could shit.
Going to look at houses with my Mommy.

Posted at 2:33 PM | 2 comments

Wednesday, February 6

I pretty much love him.

He told me I mean the world to him.

Posted at 2:13 PM | 1 comments

Tuesday, February 5

I love the way he looks at me.
I love the way he holds me.
I love the way he smiles.
I love the way he sees the world.
I love the way he jokes around.
I love the way he laughs when I tickle him.
I love the way he messes with my head.
I love the way he makes faces when I pop his pimples, or bite him.
I love the way he makes me hide in his closet when his mom comes home on lunch.
I love the way he calls me beautiful.
I love the way he tells me he loves me.
I love the way he says my name.
I love the way he holds his cigarette.
I love the way he twitches sometimes.
I love the way he gets pissed cause I don't tickle anywhere.
I love the way he has a deeper voice when he wakes up.
But what I love the most is that I'm his,
and he's mine..<3

Posted at 1:52 PM | 0 comments

Monday, February 4

I cut my thumb today.
Sparky said it might need stitched up, or he could just fix er up for me.
I had him do it, and it's throbbing.

Posted at 2:50 PM | 0 comments

Sunday, February 3

I do believe that what I feel for you is a mix of disgust and pity.
I do believe that your smile will never warm me again.
I do believe that you're ugly, on the inside at least.
I do believe that the hate is building.
I do believe that you don't understand, regardless of how much you know.
I do believe that I wont miss laying next to you.
I do believe that the hate is building.
I do believe that your trapped.

Posted at 10:55 AM | 0 comments

It's fucking beautiful out.
And I can't leave.
I want to scream!

Posted at 10:01 AM | 0 comments

Saturday, February 2

I have recently been having some skin problems.
Nothing too seriouse just some minor acne.
Well the other day I noticed this rash typething forming on my nose.
I thought it was sick so I talked to my mom.
She didn't say anything so I decided to take matters into my own hands.
Well my brother pated me back today so I went to CVS to see if I find a product to make me look less icky.
So I bought this neat little bottle of foundation.
My boyfriend put it on his hand and it looked pretty orange.
I was like what the fuck? 12 dollars spent on a cheap fake tan.
I took it home anyways and applied some evenly to my face like the bottel told me too.
I asked my mom if it looked right and she just didn't talk to me so I was like whatever then.
Well I did everything right and it would have lookd okay if it wasn't so orange.
Now what I am trying to say here is if you read this blog and you are semi girly could you please help me somehow so I don't look like The Thing.

Easy way to spend 20 dollars:

Posted at 2:46 PM | 3 comments

Friday, February 1

So there's this guy right? Well I pretty much want to marry him. When I first met him I actually kinda felt bad for him. He didn't talk a lot so I didn't really know if he had any friends [and omg was he cute] so I decided to talk to him. Well I am not the most.. sane seeming.. person in the world, but he talked to me a little, and I liked it. So we kinda just chilled for a couple days, I couldn't really tell if he thought I was nuts and felt bad for ME or if he hated me or whatever. I came to his house a lot, and like fell in love with him. I just wanted to be close to him, I wanted to feel his heartbeat, but I didn't think he could ever be into me. Well I decided to put this to the test.. I was running real late that day and my parents where going to flip out and he was walking me to the school cause he's nice like that. Well I couldn't stop thinking about how much I wanted him to hold me, and how much I wanted him to want me, and how much I needed him, and how.. So I like stopped him and kissed him. To my suprise it wasn't awkward, or wierd, or anything.. It was nice. Well I walked home, and I didn't even care how late I was, or how much trouble I was in. I was so happy I could scream, and I actually did, and soon after that I just fell in love with him, but things always fuck up so of couse we broke up. I started dating other guys, but I always wondered what he was doing, if he missed me, if he wanted me. So I went back to him, I don't even know how we ended up getting back together, but let me tell you what. I will never forget this dude, and I will love him as long as I can. He told me they always come back.. I know, no matter what happens, I hope I will have the chance to.

I love you Christian Micheal Wilson.

Posted at 7:04 AM | 2 comments